I recently found out that I’m going to be in New York on Thursday, July 31st to appear on CBS’s The Early Show and I’d like to plan an event on Wednesday evening, July 30th, for my New York readers. Anybody got any ideas? Book signings are usually planned two months ahead of time, so it’s too late for my publicist to schedule anything on her end. The Early Show tapes at Trump International Plaza at 59th Street and Fifth Avenue (next to the glass Apple Store), so a location near there would be good – either a bookstore, coffee house, or some other locale that would be okay with people gathering and watching a woman read aloud and wave a large pair of pants in the air. An independent bookseller would be lovely because they could handle book orders. If not, I still have a handful of books in my trunk that I can personally sell on the street corner of the park if it comes to that. Do I need a license for that? Do they crack down on that stuff? I’d hate to spend the night before my national TV appearance in a cell next to a hooker named Trixie. Though I’m sure my Aunt Lori would have a hell of a story to tell at the family reunion when she came to bail me out.

I would like to schedule the event for either 7 or 8 o’clock. That way I can get to bed early, but it also gives people enough time to get there after work. I’m also assuming that some of you would want to come, right? Please comment below if you think you could come, otherwise I’ll just go ride the mechanical bull at Johnny Utah’s, which I missed the last time I was in New York.

I would also like to give big props to my publicist, Isabella Michon, for her great work setting this up. It’s not like I call Les Moonves and arrange these things myself. Special thanks to Jen Rios at Seal Press for being my travel agent and booking all my flights. I am truly grateful for all the hard work everyone has put into promoting my book and I feel so lucky for all the good things that have come my way as a result. As for the question I know someone will ask – will I be able to say the title of my book on television this time? I do not know, but I’m working on a workaround if I can’t. Cross your fingers for me.